@#$%^&!!!!!!
I did it again!!!
And everytime i do the same mistakes, I feel totally angry of myself yet I feel so free, Like I'm on fire... Like I'm untouchable! The guilt so much pains me but in one way or another, there's so much joy inside that I wanted to burst out giggling at the thought of what I just did.
Maybe this is what they call the irony of happiness. I mean, you are happy, but the cause of this "happiness" was your mistake. I mean, you knew it was a mistake but you're happy still.
Also maybe this is what the irony of moving on is all about. I mean, you try to put that mistake in your past and forget about it but, still in the future, you bring it with you... and you're still happy... much happy when you brought it with you.
I don't understand... but up to now, my stomach is still tied into knots, and butterflies seem to dominate inside until I burst. Oh God. I hope I burst sooner than I'd commit this mistake of happiness again!
